An Accidental Overdose

Posted on 30. Jul, 2009 by admin in Personal Stories

There are days in everyone’s life that have the power to change everything. For me, it was June 11, 2008. I was having coffee on the back patio of our vacation home in Florida. The weather was perfect, and the world seemed as though it was finally offering a bit of relief after a rough couple of years.

I finished my cup of coffee and was about to stand up to go inside when my cell phone rang. The upbeat ringer on my phone should have been screaming and crying instead since that was what I would be doing soon after I said, “Hello.”

It was the Chaplain from the hospital in Rogers calling to say that my daughter Julie had passed away. In that moment, my whole world turned upside down. The blood rushed from my head, through my body, and down to my feet. I hung up the phone in disbelief. I had just talked to her on the phone the night before, and she was happy and healthy. We had talked about our plans for when she joined us on our vacation that Friday. I felt my body begin to shake out of control. My phone rang again, and when I recognized the number as the one that had just caused this horrible turn of events, I passed it off to my husband.

Our daughter had passed away that morning at 19.

Once I was able to control the shaking, I mustered up the strength to pack our belongings. I needed to get back to Arkansas immediately to start putting the pieces together. The police came to our home, the home she passed away in, to fill us in with what they knew so far. Julie had passed away in her sleep from an accidental prescription drug overdose. I didn’t understand how that was possible. She was healthy, loving, beautiful and smart. She was MVP in all the sports that she played. She was on the honor roll and had big dreams for the future. We lived in a nice neighborhood, and she had everything a girl could ask for — a loving brother, lots of friends and a family that adored her. Things like this didn’t happen to girls like Julie — but it did.

Sure, the teenage years were not idyllic, with fender benders to our car, smoking and the occasional sneaking out at night, but what parent can say their teenager was perfect?

Celebrities have kept the dangers of prescription drugs in the news lately, but it is far from a problem that ends when you shake your head in disbelief and turn off your TV at night. Prescriptions drugs have become a mainstay for many young adults and a rampant problem for kids right here in Northwest Arkansas.

They are as easy to get as a pack of cigarettes or a case of beer… and much more deadly. Looking back, the signs were all there, but if I saw them, I didn’t want to believe them. She began having severe anxiety in High School. I took her from doctor to doctor trying to help our little girl. She was diagnosed with anxiety and put on medication to help, which she took every morning, and things seemed to get a little better. What Jewels wasn’t telling us was that she had started to smoke and go to parties with a changing group of friends — a group of friends that didn’t come close to resembling the ones she had just months before.

All this time I kept the lines of communication open, and we encouraged her to have faith in herself and to be strong so she could beat the demons she was fighting. There were “good” days, but, with time, the “bad” came much more often. She had always been a confident and strong young lady but the outside influences were increasingly getting the best of her with each day that passed. I felt hopeless as a Mother and felt that I was failing her. The loss of motivation, the negative influences, parties, and alcohol got the best of her and she became depressed. I knew she was doing things she shouldn’t.

We had Julie admitted to get help on two separate occasions. Her problems began when she was 16, and by the time she was 18, we were no longer in control since she was considered an adult according to the state. She wasn’t old enough to buy beer but old enough to be in control of her life. This was an ongoing hardship for our family. We took her to court and had her rights taken away and admitted her again for help. This time seemed to work, and our family began to piece the puzzle back together. We planned a vacation to Florida. But a few short months later, she was gone.

Pills do not have a smell like alcohol does, and they don’t necessarily change your behavior. They are hard to detect and so easy to hide. What wasn’t easy to hide was the fact that I watched as my beautiful, young, talented and loving daughter became someone else.
And it was someone that she didn’t like very much.

There is not a day that goes by that I do not cry for Julie. Teen girls are faced with so many issues that they deal with, from eating disorders, to sexual pressures, to drugs and alcoholism. Unfortunately, prescription drugs do not have a face. It affects every race, affluent families, poor families, successful kids and lost kids. Jewels lost her way because of these little pills that are so easy to get. In the end, they cost her her life.

As for myself, Julie’s Dad and Brother, we take each day as it comes. But for Jewels, we want to tell her story. No family should have to go through what we endured last year. Because of these pills, we lost a daughter, a niece, a sister, a cousin, and a friend.

The living suffer every day over the loss of a loved one. Our mantra has become: “Get better, not bitter.” It is my sincere wish that no one loses a loved one like the way we lost our “Jewels.”

Love you Jewels, infinity, ding!